Things that go through my head at the gym:
  • Um that looks complicated, can’t I just use dumbells?
  • Holy crap that guy can lift a lot.
  • Typewriter pull ups, yowza 
  • Can you please put on a shirt?
  • Don’t talk to me.  No I mean it, don’t even freaking look at me.
  • How original, asking if I work out.
  • Why dear god did I think it was a good idea to let Mae set my workout???
  • Oooo look I finished!
  • Can’t…breathe!
  • What do you mean I have only been running for 5 minutes???  This will never end.
  • I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts , there they are all standing in a row.
  • Was I on left or right?  Nope other left!
  • I am no expert but I am fairly confident that is NOT how you use that.
  • One more set and then I can be lazy on the couch for the rest of the night.
  • Ok after a shower I can be lazy.  Man I feel gross.
  • Just keep swimming, just keep swimming.  
  • Gah! Water in my ear!
  • That is why you never skip leg day.
  • He looks just like Kurt Sutter!  
  • Young lady you cannot get off this stair climber till you hit 2 IDS Centers.  Stop your bitching.
  • This is going to hurt tomorrow.
  • Sandals?  At the gym?
  • Ok if I tried that I would sooooo hurt myself.
  • Oooo I like her pants!  Probably won’t look like that on me though.
  • Run Forest, run!
  • Can someone look Austrian?  I think he looks Austrian.
  • No excuses, that guy is pushing 80 and still works out 5 days a week.
  • That class looks brutal but the instructors music is awesome.  I would try that.
  • One plank, two plank, red plank, blue plank!
  • How can a simple piece of foam feel so good at the end of a workout?  Greatest thing ever!

So tell me folks, what is your inner gym monologue? 

Love and yoga pants,



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